Fall is easily my favourite season – the air is crisp but comfortable, unfortunate armpit-baring tank tops get replaced with cozy armpit-hiding cardigans, and there’s glorious raking to be done. Raking? Really? Yes, really! We all have our quirks and raking is mine; raking leaves is easily one of my favourite household chores. It’s relaxing, productive, outdoorsy, and like the McRib or buying DVDs from “Disney’s vault”, available for only a limited time. There’s choice too! You can use a classic style rake or go all out on the latest in rake technologies. What’s not love? Back aches. The fact that a new pile of leaves can blow in at any moment. That it cuts into valuable pumpkin pie eating time. Well, if that’s your attitude, comedienne Amy Sedaris provides something else you can do with your rake – but it may not be suitable around children. Or your parents. Or anyone you have to look in the eye later.
If you “can’t afford sticks or branches” Sedaris shows us how to use a rake to cook hot dogs in her book Simple Times: Crafts for Poor People. All you need is a metal rake, some weiners, an open flame, and a trusty (preferably male) assistant. She’s goofing on us, of course, but that didn’t stop her from making a Martha Stewart-esque video to show us how it’s really done. It’s not really NSFW, but it sort of is, compliments of the running gag involving some rather tight shots on the hotdogs and the man’s … uh … pelvis in the background, so only watch this if you’ve staged your cubicle for privacy or figure you’ve already ruined your children and don’t care what they catch you watching:
So, that’s your choice folks: rake those leaves or squeeze and man-handle those weiners onto metal spears.
See you outside.