Now THIS is a Throne: The Brondell Swash Toilet

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North Americans travelling in certain parts of Europe without fail giggle like mad when they come across a particular hotel room feature – the bidet. Tee hee, because, you see, it shoots water at their derrières. Tee Hee. Well, Brondell wants you to forget about those silly arse-sprinkling Europeans. Europeans bidet. Americans SWASH.

Allow me introduce to you to the Brondell Swash Toilet.

Yes, siree, why wipe with rough toilet paper when you can SWASH? Why sit on a cold seat when you can sit on a heated SWASH? Why bother lifting or lowering the toilet seat when you can SWASH it down?

Pardon the pun, but are they shi$$ing me?

Nope. They aren’t – and this apparently is the future of toilets. Mountable on your regular toilet, this “super seat” comes in a range of models – the most modest retails for $230 and the fanciest of the bunch – which comes complete with a warm air dryer and a wireless remote control – will set your backside back a cool $800.

Words can’t quite capture it, so we suggest you check out the range of Brondell Swash Toilets at like the Elongated Swash 450 by Brondell and the video we’ve shown here. has their full line-up (in both round and elongated variations).

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About Jen

Jen (but never “Jenn”) Byck, aka the Fix'n Vixen, is a Toronto-based freelance writer and communication consultant who is undoubtedly home fixated (she is also TV fixated, really bad TV fixated and donut fixated). Her approach to home improvement has been rather trial and error, the latter of which is evidenced by the amount of spackle she buys on an annual basis.

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